Artie Lange: Heroin, Coke, Overdose, Suicide, Howard Stern, and the Day Everything Fell Apart, Dopey's Greatest Hits Replay

Dopey: On the Dark Comedy of Drug Addiction

Dave & Chris

Alternative Health, Mental Health, Comedy, Health & Fitness

4.8 • 2.9K Ratings

🗓️ 26 March 2026

⏱️ 127 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

⏱️ TIMESTAMPS 00:00 – Dopey intro song + chaotic junkie anthem 02:20 – Dave intro from Manhattan, spring day + life update 04:40 – Listener email: heroin at 14, survival, recovery 06:30 – Dopey Greatest Hits intro + Artie Lang setup 13:10 – Artie Lang enters (chaos immediately) 15:00 – First impressions + Stern + addiction talk 17:00 – Shooting coke, early addiction, AA + redemption talk 22:00 – Santa Claus story (shitting pants in Santa suit) 29:00 – Dirty Work, Mad TV, coke chaos, jail 33:30 – Blowing movie opportunity buying coke before audition 36:30 – Norm Macdonald + gambling + $100k bookie disaster 42:00 – More gambling insanity + losing everything 48:30 – Getting on Howard Stern (origin story) 55:00 – Stern Show peak + becoming famous 01:03:00 – Vegas debauchery + strippers + chaos 01:08:00 – Heroin enters the picture 01:14:00 – Full addiction spiral + missing Stern shows 01:18:00 – Using during Stern + nodding out on air 01:21:00 – Suicide attempt + stabbing + drinking bleach 01:27:00 – Rehab, relapse, seizures, near death 01:30:00 – Comeback attempt + standup + radio deal 01:33:00 – Family impact (mom + sister) 01:37:00 – Relationship with Howard Stern + falling out 01:45:00 – Emotional reflection + father + legacy 01:49:00 – Todd story + overdose (heavy shift) 01:53:00 – Rage, humor, grief all collide 01:57:00 – Ending chaos + Artie riffing + Dopey vibes 02:02:00 – Dave outro + Chris reflection + full circle

Transcript

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0:00.0	You know I'm a junkie.
0:02.0	I love shooting dope.
0:18.0	I stay high all the time will I ever stop no I love needles black tar and abscess is filled with us wearing makeup and shooting dope is so god damn glamorous I love podcasts
0:39.3	one day I'll go on one
0:43.3	some dopey podcast
0:46.3	because I love heroin
0:49.3	I'm on my way
0:56.0	Coming in
0:58.0	Paramail Oh, on my way. I'm coming in. I'm coming. I'm coming.
1:11.6	I'm going to
1:12.6	this.
1:13.6	This song goes out to everybody in the combination.
1:18.6	Fucking tutels. Hey, hey, hey, hey, it's time for dope.
1:35.3	And I want to sing a song for you.
1:38.3	Damn Chris gonna show you a finger too.
1:43.3	You'll have some fun now with me and all. Damn Chris gonna show you a big or two.
1:49.0	You'll have some fun now with me and all the gang.
1:54.0	Learning from each other while we do our thing.
1:58.0	Nah, la, nah, no, go to have a good time. Yeah, hey.
1:59.0	Nah, nah, nah, no, go to help the time. Danny Chris coming up to the with a time. Nah, nah, nah, go to hell get time.
2:01.6	If you're not careful, you might learn something before we're talking.
2:07.6	Hey, hey, hey!
	...

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