91. Conversation with a Client: A Behind-the-Scenes Look at What Happens When Wives Earn More

The Suzanne Venker Show

Suzanne Venker

Society & Culture

4.9 • 650 Ratings

🗓️ 4 April 2021

⏱️ 53 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

It is one of the most taboo topics on the planet: what happens when wives earn more. The following podcast is an in-depth look at what happened when one wife's side hustle exploded and created a rift in her marriage, causing resentment and frustration that led to an eventual separation.

When Lauren Taylor, who's from South Africa, first reached out to me, she and her husband Jarryd had separated and were close to divorce when she heard me on The Mikhaila Peterson Podcast. After purchasing and reading a copy of The Alpha Female’s Guide to Men & Marriage, Lauren signed up for marriage coaching.

On her intake form, Lauren wrote that she wanted "to be softer and kinder and more tolerant of her husband's shortcomings, to find a way to effectively balance their roles and responsibilities, to find a solution to their finances, to stop feeling resentful, and to feel safe, secure, and adored."

Several years prior to their separation, Lauren had started an online weight-loss business called Happy Shrinkers—which was fueled by her own struggle to lose weight—with the intent of having it be a side gig. Instead, it exploded and before she knew it she was out-earning her husband tenfold.

Lauren is not an anomaly. She represents millions of women who are out-earning the men they love, and it's causing problems no wants to talk about. If you read about breadwinning wives in the news, the message is always the same: Men need to "man up" and get over it.

This is a very simplistic and entirely unhelpful narrative. This new marital dynamic is far from innocuous, nor is it going away. Both men and women suffer, albeit in different ways, when wives earn more—and divorce is much more likely to occur. Even if couples don't get divorced, their marriages are often mired in conflict.

That is why I'm enormously grateful to Lauren for having the courage to come on The Suzanne Venker Show and discuss this very timely, and very personal, subject. It is my hope that her story resonates and helps other couples in the same boat understand what they're dealing with and gain useful insights about how keep their relationship afloat.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey guys. So I have some great news. I'm really excited to share with you.
0:19.5	If you are a single woman, a divorced woman,
0:23.3	or if you have a daughter who's single or divorced, you are going to want to get a copy of my new
0:29.1	book, How to Get Hitched and Stay Hitched, which is available now at Amazon for pre-order.
0:36.4	And here's some inside scoop you probably don't know. Pre-orders matter.
0:40.9	They're a great indication of consumer interest in a book. So if a lot of people pre-order
0:45.2	the book, retailers are more likely to keep a lot of copies in stock. So please, please,
0:50.0	head on over to Amazon and type in how to get hitched. This book is the antidote you need to reject
0:55.7	the lies you've been fed by the culture about men, about sex, about love, about marriage, and about
1:01.5	work and family. It's about what you really want versus what you've been told you should want.
1:06.4	And it's about what's true of men in marriage versus what you've been told is true.
1:12.4	The subtitle of the book is a 12-step program for marriage-minded women because it's designed to be a detox from the
1:18.8	cultural garbage women have been fed for years and to help support you in your desire to be as
1:24.4	successful in your personal life as you are in your professional life. Again,
1:29.4	that's how to get hitched and stay hitched, a 12-step program for marriage-minded women up at
1:34.7	Amazon for pre-order now. Okay, guys, I cannot tell you how excited I am for today's podcast episode. It's the first of
1:45.7	its kind, and I wish I could tell you that more will come, but the truth is it's really hard
1:51.1	to get a coaching client who's willing to talk about their marital struggles. Obviously,
1:55.9	I mean, that's not surprising. Fortunately, Lauren Taylor is unique in this way and agreed to
2:00.7	come on my podcast to talk about
2:02.3	her and her husband, Jared's struggles and about our work together.
2:05.9	When Lauren, who, by the way, is from South Africa, first reached out to me, she and her
	...

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