Welcome back to We Can Do Hard Things. We are going to jump right in today because we are lucky enough to have Dr. Jen Gunter back to answer all of our burning.

For many of us, menopausal women, literal burning questions about menopause because we are committing the feminist act of demanding to understand our own bodies.

And we are also going to talk about all of even the embarrassing things about menopause in our bodies today because we refuse to allow the entire world to talk about women's bodies and sit it out.

Everything on earth is sold with a woman's body. Everybody from companies to movies to everyone earth religions to congresses gets to talk.

Incessantly about women's bodies and then for some reason, we are ashamed to take the conversation back. So we're not just going to let the whole world talk about the way our bodies look today. We're going to talk about the way our bodies function and feel.

And we're going to do that with the Dr. Jen Gunter who is an OBGYN and pain medicine physician and the author of the menopause manifesto can't recommend enough also the vagina Bible and the preemie primer.

And Dr. Jenna wants you to understand that I have the menopause manifesto and the vagina Bible on my coffee table so that everyone who sits down can feel more comfortable with the words menopause and vagina right up in their face.

She is the host of the podcast body stuff Ted audio collective and of the streaming docu series Jen explaining.

She blogs at the vajenda.com and her writing can also be found in the New York Times clamor dame and other publications. Her mission is to build a better medical internet.

She has been called Twitter's gynecologist the internet's OBGYN and a fierce advocate for women's health. Dr. Jen Gunter, thank you for returning to we can do hard things.

Thank you.

We're going to talk today about the biggest most important most common questions that folks have about menopause and our first one is from Lynn.

This is when I'm facing menopause and if I hear one more goddamn thing about a hot flash or about all the sort of surrounding things for midlife.

No one is talking about orgasm I can't have an orgasm anymore and I'm shouting it from the rooftop because I'm so tired of this being dismissed.

I listen to so many midlife podcasts. Oh, just rub a little essential oil. I don't need essential oil. I need an orgasm. Do you understand? And I know you feel me.

So just please help me find a really good person that can come on your show. Talk about orgasm. Talk about the brain event.

I just need a bunch of professionals to figure out why I can't have an orgasm at 50. It's not okay. Okay. I love you. I love sister. I love Abby. I love the whole thing. I guess that's it. I think that's enough. I'm not angry. I'm just ready to get some answers. Love you guys.

I love her. I love her. I don't need essential oils. I need a goddamn orgasm. Can we call this episode that?

I just think I can only speak in generalizations because there are so many questions to ask an individual person and especially when you're talking about sex, you actually have to know what their sex life is beforehand leading up to it.

So if we're sort of thinking about somebody who said, you know, I'm really having difficulty achieving orgasm or I can't achieve orgasm now.

There are kind of a list of things to run through. So the first is probably to start treatment with vaginal estrogen to make sure that you have enough blood flow to the tissues. So when we go through menopause, there's a decrease of flow of estrogen to our vaginal tissues.

And that affects how well things function. And if you think about Viagra and those drugs, phosphodiesterase inhibitors for men, what they do is they increase blood flow to the penis.

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