900 - The Stripes are All There
A Mediocre Time with Tom and Dan
Tom Vann & Dan Dennis
4.8 • 2.3K Ratings
🗓️ 21 November 2025
⏱️ 113 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
• Sponsor talk about Modern Plumbing and finding a swollen kitchen pipe
• Friday Free Show kickoff with old-school Tom & Dan vibe
• Out-of-town BDMs arriving for weekend events
• Certified Best Roofing and Tom the Mime announced for Beer Fest
• Florida site blocks leading Tom to Surfshark VPN and jokes about regional porn
• Surfshark promo compared to other VPNs
• Daniel preparing for a concert while battling baseline anxiety
• Judson's Live described as intimate; past News Junkie roast mentioned
• Stress over leaving Jimmy's show early and short radio segments
• Caffeine warnings, energy-drink jokes, and night-before anxiety
• Positive Jimmy-show feedback before rushing to Judson's
• Daniel attending alone, front-row, ordering sliders, interacting with listeners
• Jordan Foley performing with surprises, duet with his wife
• Daniel's iPhone alarm blasting during her solo despite silent mode
• Panic trying to stop the alarm; audience noticing; intense embarrassment
• Debate on apologizing vs. moving on
• Doctors profiling patients for pain meds; pill-prescribing inconsistencies
• Andrea calling in about skin cancer diagnosis and surgeries
• Mohs procedure details, emotional stress, reconstruction choice, stitch recovery
• Joke about hiding OxyContin; reminder of addiction risks
• Documentary discussion kickoff after break
• Cadillac Pat's "treasure" mix-up with founder photo and legal threats
• Viral Kevin Spacey "homeless" headline debunked
• Eddie Murphy documentary talk: age, talent, career, eccentricities, fame
• Comparison to Chappelle and modern fragmented stardom
• Nate Bargatze's proposed "NateLand" and passion-project pitfalls
• Eddie Murphy's multi-character roles, disciplined childhood, avoiding vices
• SNL tensions, Bill Murray stories, past controversies
• Bad national anthem performance found online; hosts try to contact singer
• Discussion of stage fright and famous anthem flubs
• New documentary on dangerous neighbors and intro to Hate Thy Neighbor segment
• Listener Cara's story: elderly neighbors, alcoholic daughter, grifter takeover, drug den, SWAT raids, abandoned house, trapped dog, eventual cleanup
• Reflection on neighbor feuds, escalation, and Dan's dad vs. Mike Frye
• E-bike bans at schools and crackdown comparisons
• Notes on regulation vs. freedom and local enforcement differences
• Updates to the T&D app and website
• Tesla driving modes including Mad Max; safety debate and feature removals
• Waffle House "tactical breakfast" voicemail
• Toilet-seat gasket debate and bathroom-hygiene jokes
• Caller comparing Tom & Dan to Chevy Chase and Paul Simon; bass-solo gripe
• Final push for Beer Fest and Sofas & Suds; thanks to travelers and long-running event clarification
###
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Where to Find the Show:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-mediocre-time/id334142682 | https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkLnBvZGJlYW4uY29tL2FtZWRpb2NyZXRpbWUvcG9kY2FzdC54bWw | https://tunein.com/podcasts/Comedy/A-Mediocre-Time-p364156/
Tom & Dan on Real Radio 104.1:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-corporate-time/id975258990 | https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkLnBvZGJlYW4uY29tL2Fjb3Jwb3JhdGV0aW1lL3BvZGNhc3QueG1s | https://tunein.com/podcasts/Comedy/A-Corporate-Time-p1038501/
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Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Today's a mediocre time with Tom and Dad podcast is brought you back. |
| 0:08.0 | What are you doing? |
| 0:08.8 | I'm a turd monster. |
| 0:10.1 | Turd monster? |
| 0:11.4 | Yeah, I'm the enemy of modern PI, modern plumbing industries. |
| 0:15.5 | I'm the turd monster. |
| 0:16.9 | And I had a turd monster that was just getting my toilet right off the side of the old main bedroom getting me bad. |
| 0:24.0 | And they fixed it. |
| 0:25.4 | Very easy. |
| 0:26.0 | Fifteen minutes later, you know, because they know what they're doing. |
| 0:28.6 | I just had modern plumbing over my house. |
| 0:31.2 | No, I, okay, my toilet was running, and I tried to fix it myself multiple times. And times and I spent oh the old waste of time |
| 0:41.5 | never remembers he can't do this so I so and I know what you're saying you're like you're doing |
| 0:46.7 | your client is modern plumbing why you try to fix yourself because I'm like I can fix a running |
| 0:51.0 | toilet I you know listen I'm not completely inapt to it. |
| 0:55.1 | You were so funny? |
| 0:56.1 | I did the same thing, but Andrea didn't even listen to me. She just called them. No, no, I'll just do it. But it's been three, you know, still running, and the gasket wasn't seated properly. Anyway, he came over. Now, here's the great part. while he was there, Crystal thought, |
| 1:10.3 | like, I think there's something wrong with |
| 1:12.0 | under the sink. And I was like, that's fine. |
| 1:14.7 | And... Now, here's the great part. While he was there, Crystal thought, like, I think there's something wrong with under the sink. |
| 1:12.8 | And I was like, that's fine. |
| 1:14.9 | In front of the guy. |
... |
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