8 Steps to Connect & Create Chemistry (or not) w/ Deep Listening Expert Emily Kasriel

What Drives You with Kevin Miller

Kevin Miller

Education, Relationships, How To, Social Sciences, Nutrition, Life Sciences, Spirituality, Medicine, Religion & Spirituality, Science, Society & Culture, Health & Fitness, Mental Health, Self-improvement

4.4 • 1.4K Ratings

🗓️ 23 June 2025

⏱️ 70 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

I find there are few things as intoxicating as someone who is really interested in you. You feel they care about you, they value you, and they are curious to hear about you. This is something you can define and do, if you understand the key components. So I have an expert on listening with us. But before I introduce them, one issue that stuck out to me was, the idea of becoming and being an expert listener, is to connect. But, I don’t want to connect with everyone. My goal is not to have everyone think I’m a great listener, because I don’t want to connect with everyone. I don’t think anyone does. I realize when I am trying to listen with endurance and tolerance when I don’t really want to, I’m actually hurting the relationship. You can hear more on this in the show. My expert guest is Emily Kasriel Emily is an award-winning journalist, editor, and media executive who worked for over 20 years at the BBC. She developed the Deep Listening approach during her time as a Senior Visiting Research Fellow at King’s College London’s Policy Institute, building on her expertise as an accredited executive coach and workplace mediator. Emily connected with me from her home in London and I feel we had a very real and sober discussion not only about how to be an expert listener, but to be authentic about when we want to listen, or not. The 8 steps we walk through on listening come from her new book, Deep Listening: Transform Your Relationships with Family, Friends, and Foes Sign up for your $1/month trial period at shopify.com/kevin Go to shipstation.com and use code KEVIN to start your free trial. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome. I'm Kevin Miller. This is a podcast for your personal evolution. In this episode,
0:06.2	eight steps to connect and create chemistry or not with deep listening. I find there are few things
0:14.8	as intoxicated as someone who's really interested in you. You feel they care about you and they
0:20.2	value you and they're
0:21.3	curious to hear about you. Well, this is something you can define and learn how to do if you
0:27.4	understand the key components. So I have an expert on listening, deep listening with us.
0:32.6	But before I introduced them, one issue that stuck out to me was the idea of becoming and being an expert
0:41.1	listener. Well, it is to connect, to truly connect. But I don't want to connect with everyone. So I came
0:48.0	away realizing, you know, my goal is not to have everyone think I'm a great listener. And I don't
0:53.9	want everyone to think I'm a great cook because I mean, I don't want everyone to think I'm a great cook because
0:55.7	I'm not cooking for everyone. You know, I don't want to connect necessarily with everyone. And I don't
1:01.4	think anyone does. There's not enough time. And I realize when I'm trying to listen to someone and I'm
1:07.1	just enduring it, I'm just tolerating it. I don't really care. I'm actually hurting the
1:12.3	relationship. Well, you can hear more on this concept that I brought up in just a moment. My expert
1:20.0	guest is Emily Casriel. Emily is an award-winning journalist, editor, and media executive. She worked for 20 years with the BBC.
1:30.5	She developed the deep listening approach during her time as senior visiting research fellow at
1:36.2	King's College, London's Policy Institute, building on her expertise as an accredited
1:41.7	executive coach and workplace mediator. Emily connected with me from her home in London.
1:46.8	I feel like we had a very real and sober discussion not only about how to be an expert
1:54.4	listener, deep listener, but to also be authentic about when we want to listen or not.
2:00.1	This is about being authentic.
2:02.5	So the eight steps that you'll hear us walk through as we discuss this come from her new book.
	...

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