Welcome to the Very Well Mind podcast. We've interviewed over 100 authors, experts, entrepreneurs, athletes, musicians, and others to help you learn strategies to care for your mental health.

This episode is hosted by psychotherapist and bestselling author Amy Morin. Now let's get into the episode.

Okay. You're listening to the Friday fix.

Every Friday, I share a quick mental strength exercise that will help fix the thoughts,

feelings, and actions that pulled you back in life.

Now, let's dive in today's episode.

Today, we're talking about a science-back strategy for giving an effective apology. The news is often filled with cringeworthy apologies. Business leaders and politicians will say things like,

I'm sorry if people were offended. Or I'm sorry to those who felt hurt. Those apologies

are usually phony and scripted, and they don't take any responsibility for their actions.

Those kinds of non-apologies don't fix this situation. In fact, they often make things worse.

Meanwhile, social media is often filled with memes saying things like you shouldn't apologize.

Rather than say, sorry I'm late, they encourage you to say, thank you for waiting.

And while I agree that it's easy to apologize for things that aren't even your fault or for behavior that wasn't necessarily wrong,

it's not healthy to avoid apologizing when you've actually messed up.

If you're late,

apologize to the other person who had to wait for you. You can also thank them for waiting,

but you probably owe them and I'm sorry too. But you don't necessarily need to apologize just because it took you an hour to reply to someone else's email. And you don't need to

apologize just because someone else is upset. You might not have necessarily done anything wrong. Everyone messes up sometimes, though,

and it can be hard to know how to recover from a mistake that you make. Sometimes people avoid

apologies for fear that they'll look weak. But delivering a sincere, heartfelt apology is a sign of

mental strength.

It's much easier to blame someone else or make an excuse for your behavior than it is to take responsibility for making a mistake.

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