76: How and When Do I Tell My Kids Their Grandma is Dying?

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens

Dr. Lisa Damour/Reena Ninan

Mental Health, Kids & Family, Health & Fitness, Parenting

4.7 • 824 Ratings

🗓️ 12 April 2022

⏱️ 28 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

How do you deal with grief and explain death to your kids? Knowing that you are losing a parent is difficult but how do you also help your kids process what will be coming? Dr. Lisa explains what kids need at different ages when processing grief and answers a parent’s question on how often kids should visit dying grandparents. Reena asks where parents are most likely to miss the mark when dealing with grief. Dr. Lisa explains why honesty is hugely important, and talks with Reena about how to prepare kids for funerals. Dr. Lisa’s Books Recommendations on Grief Fall of Freddy the Leaf, By Leo Buscaglia, PhD The Tenth Good Thing About Barney, By Judith Viorst What’s Heaven?, By Maria Shriver Grief Day By Day,By Jan Warner The AfterGrief: Finding Your Way Along the Long Arc of Loss, By Hope Edelman Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinan Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: Www.GoodTroubleProductions.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Transcript

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0:00.0	This is Ask Lisa, a podcast to help people understand the psychology of parenting.
0:10.0	Psychologist Dr. Lisa DeMore, author of two New York Times best-selling parenting books, takes your questions.
0:17.0	And I'm co-host, Rina Ninan, a journalist and mom of two.
0:24.2	Some of what we talk about comes from raising children ourselves.
0:28.2	Most of the time, I'll be getting answers to your parenting questions.
0:33.1	So send your questions to Ask Lisa at Dr.LisaDemore.com.
0:39.3	Episode 76, how and when do I tell my kids their grandma is dying? Well, there seems like some hope with spring around the corner.
0:45.3	There does. Oh, Rina, to have the windows open is making my day is so much better.
0:52.3	I just, oh, I love fresh air so much. I'm just thrilled that they're
0:55.7	hopefully getting rid of daylight savings time, so. You know, that would be a wonderful thing.
1:02.0	It is ridiculous, and it makes my family so miserable. You were saying this once on an Instagram
1:07.3	live that you can tell, like kids are just a total mess when they lose that
1:11.6	one hour of sleep. Well, and mostly you just feel so bad for their teachers, you know, sending
1:16.2	them to school when you know that they're kind of a wreck. So true. So true. Speaking of time
1:23.4	and how valuable it is and how much we've realized that in this pandemic. We got a letter asking about grief.
1:29.0	And when do you let someone know that their grandparents are dying?
1:32.5	I'm going to read you this letter, Lisa.
1:34.3	Dear Dr. Lisa, my kids 10 and 12 are lucky to have a close relationship with her Nana,
1:39.5	my husband's mother.
1:40.7	We live locally, and Nana's been a big part of their lives, including regular visits.
1:45.3	The past few years have been a roller coaster of cancer diagnosis, surgery, chemo that is working
1:50.6	and chemo that is not working. Treatment options are now exhausted. Nana has recently entered
	...

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