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Mental Illness Happy Hour

#667 Regulating Intense Emotions - Elyse Cizek

Mental Illness Happy Hour

Paul Gilmartin

Health & Fitness, Relationships, Society & Culture, Mental Health, Sexuality

4.86.1K Ratings

🗓️ 27 October 2023

⏱️ 137 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Elyse Cizek is a writer and a musician who opens up about her journey of self-reflection and change, what it’s been like living with BPD, and how she manages relationships in her life given her diagnosis. She also shares a number of incredible self-soothing tactics that have helped her along the way. 


More About Elyse:


https://zora.medium.com/dear-white-friends-335d6088077


https://elysecizek.medium.com/cancel-culture-isnt-real-4d2b62b47a9d


https://tr.ee/FaBAW-U5lP


https://linktr.ee/elysecizek?utm_source=linktree_profile_share&ltsid=ff2aafcf-ed3c-4dcc-96b0-b0f6624d436d


Elyse’s Tips To Self-Soothe

1. Recognize that I am dysregulated. Stepping outside and observing how I’m feeling helps me to separate the feelings/fear from reality and allow myself to feel them, but without the urgency to act.


2. Talk to myself. Out loud. “Hey, I’m here. You’re ok. You’re safe.” Saying things like this, wrapping my arms around myself, kissing my shoulders, rubbing my cheeks…I can be angry, sad, overwhelmed, but I get to do it in the safe embrace of myself.


3. Ask myself what I need. Again. Out loud. Do I need a glass of water? To go outside? Something to eat? The process of cooking or preparing food, filling a glass of water, etc, is excellent in these times. I cry while I do it. I scream. I lay on the floor if I need to, then get back up. 


4. Do something with my hands. Wash a dish, write something down, sweep my floors, take my dog outside, again-preparing food. All of it helps keep my brain preoccupied. 


5. Call someone. Anyone. Talk to a human being. About anything. 


If I’m not at home:

All of these work but if I’m in public (like a gym or a movie theater) and a panic attack comes on, I go outside. The self-soothing of embracing myself and talking to myself is still a major first step. Who cares who’s watching?! 

Besides that, I will run around the block or call a friend.


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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Welcome to episode 667 with my guest, Elise Cisec.

0:09.0

My name is Paul Gilmarton and here's a medal in this happy hour.

0:14.0

It's a place for honesty about all the bullshit rattling around in our heads.

0:20.0

This place is not meant to be a substitute for professional medal counseling.

0:25.3

I am not a therapist.

0:26.6

You've been warned.

0:28.6

Did you enjoy 666?

0:30.2

Did you make it through it?

0:31.2

It was some dark surveys and those were only called from the first one-fifth of the

0:42.2

surveys that have been filled out.

0:46.0

Mostly the shaman secret surveys, I think we also had some awful moments and some other

0:50.6

stuff in there.

0:51.6

But yeah, some people were like, man, that was too heavy for me.

0:55.0

Some people felt that I was maybe a little too glib about it.

1:01.3

Some people wanted to hear dark music behind it and I would say the majority of people

1:07.0

that weighed in on it were happy that I did it and got through the whole thing and

1:14.4

is enjoy a right verb to use.

1:18.6

But yeah, enjoyed it, found an odd comfort in it, I knew there was something I wanted

1:30.8

to say.

1:33.1

I vaguely mentioned in the past couple of months, maybe the last three or months or so that

1:41.6

I made the ethical decision to part ways with a major source of income for the podcast.

1:51.1

It was over half of the income of this podcast.

...

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