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Freedomain with Stefan Molyneux

6332 Father Bad, Mother GOOD! CALL IN SHOW

Freedomain with Stefan Molyneux

Stefan Molyneux

Atheism, Democrat, Pacifism, Freedomainradio, Objectivism, Liberal, Conservative, Objectivist, Politics, Joe-rogan, Libertarian, Atheist, Republican, News & Politics, Philosophy, Anarchy, Freedom

4.72.4K Ratings

🗓️ 18 March 2026

⏱️ 107 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

A listener calls in, wrestling with the estrangement he chose from his abusive father. Stefan Molyneux listens as the man describes his decision to “defoo” and cut contact. Stefan stresses that firm boundaries are essential when someone has proven destructive, and he warns against reopening the door to a parent who shows no genuine remorse or change. He guides the caller toward focusing on his own healing and building real autonomy instead of hoping for reconciliation that may never come.

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Transcript

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0:00.0

I defood from my father about three years ago now, and I had no problem doing it because

0:09.5

there was an incident and there was a lot of stuff leading up to it for 10 years or, you know,

0:16.4

basically my whole life, but I never had the conversation, the D-Fu conversation with him. I just felt like it was

0:25.0

totally unreasonable at the time. He wouldn't, there's no way he would ever listen to me,

0:29.6

because he never had had in the past. And, you know, it's been three years now. And occasionally

0:35.3

I get comments from, well, messages from him.

0:38.6

And I see them and it's all this stuff about you ghosted me. You never gave me a chance. You never

0:43.0

wanted to hear me out. And I'm wondering now how, I mean, I have a lot of questions, but the main thing

0:49.4

is, how necessary is it that I talk to him? Did I already screw it up? Can I go back now and talk to him?

0:57.0

And how can I just figure out to do? I'm very sorry for the situation. Of course, it's always a great

1:02.9

tragedy. And I just want to extend my sympathies for that. And I guess I'll need some

1:13.4

backstory. I mean, there's no recipe for this kind of stuff.

1:17.5

There's not a sort of have to like a checklist, you know, like when you're going to fly a plane,

1:23.9

you check your fuel and, you know, check your aerolans and so on. So there's no absolute recipe or menu for this kind of stuff. So it's not like you have to, well, you can't.

1:33.9

The general purpose of the conversation about any kind of separation of a relationship is to make sure that there's closure, and closure just means certainty.

1:38.1

So it's not like you did a right thing or a wrong thing in having or not having the, as you say, the D-FU conversation.

1:46.1

So I just want to put that out up front. But if I can get some backstory to this sad tale,

1:50.5

I'd appreciate that.

1:52.4

Thank you so much. Yeah. So I don't even know where to begin, but basically, ever since I was

1:59.1

a little kid, I knew that there was something off about

2:01.1

my father, and I had been, as soon as I was old enough to realize it and communicate it, I was

2:09.3

communicating it to the other members of my family, but obviously not to him, because I knew that if I,

...

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