6 Signs Your Relationship Won’t Survive - Take the 91% Accurate Divorce Test Now | Dr. Julie Gottman PT 2

Women of Impact

Impact Theory

Society & Culture, Relationships, Education

4.8 • 701 Ratings

🗓️ 14 August 2025

⏱️ 44 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

We’re back for Part 2 of our powerful conversation with world-renowned relationship expert Dr. Julie Gottman. If you’ve ever felt stuck in repetitive conflict, uncertain if your partner will ever change, or wondered what science actually says about lasting love—this episode is your essential roadmap. Lisa and Dr. Julie dig deep into the anatomy of relational disaster versus mastery—naming the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, sharing the six breakthrough questions couples need to ask in gridlock, and breaking down how the first three minutes of a fight can predict your relationship’s future six years out. Plus, Dr. Julie shares practical rituals that power her own 38-year marriage, the biggest mistakes even therapists make, and how to reconnect from even the deepest moments of distance. This episode is packed with science, lived wisdom, and hope for every relationship stage. SHOWNOTES38:20 The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, Stonewalling47:09 The Power of Compassion in Conflict54:45 The Importance of Daily Gratitude & Small Gestures61:45 High-Risk Moments for Cheating & How to Protect Your Marriage71:05 How to Heal After Regrettable Incidents FOLLOW DR. JULIE GOTTMAN:Website: https://www.gottman.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/gottmaninstituteTwitter: https://twitter.com/gottmaninstFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/gottmaninstitute CHECK OUT OUR SPONSORS Vital Proteins: Get 20% off by going to ⁠https://www.vitalproteins.com⁠ and entering promo code WOI at check out. SleepMe: Visit ⁠https://sleep.me/woi⁠ to get your Chilipad and save 20% with code WOI. Try it risk-free with their 30-night sleep trial and free shipping! OneSkin: Get 15% off with code LISA at ⁠https://oneskin.co ⁠ Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial period at ⁠https://shopify.com/lisa⁠ Macy’s: Upgrade your glam at ⁠https://macys.com⁠ ********************************************************************** LISTEN TO WOMEN OF IMPACT AD FREE + BONUS EPISODES on APPLE PODCASTS:⁠ ⁠ ⁠apple.co/womenofimpact⁠ ********************************************************************** FOLLOW LISA: Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/lisabilyeu/⁠ Twitter: ⁠https://twitter.com/lisabilyeu⁠ YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/womenofimpact⁠ Tik Tok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@lisa_bilyeu?lang=en⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:42.4	All right, well up my homie.
0:43.7	Welcome back to part two with Dr. Julie Gottman.
0:46.0	Yesterday, we got into why men and women sometimes feel like they're speaking different languages.
0:52.3	Feel like you're from a different planet?
0:58.0	Just saying. And the little shifts that make a big, huge difference. Now today, we're actually stepping it up a little with the tools that you can use the second this episode is over.
1:04.0	So we dive into how to come back from a fight without sweeping it under the rug.
1:09.0	I know it may feel good. Oh, it really feels good. You just think, you know what? If I just pretend this didn't happen, I can sit down and just watch my TV show in peace, right with a cup of coffee or whatever. But I'm telling you, when you sweep it under the rug, it is doing damage that you literally don't get to see until it's too late. So you're going to want to listen to this. We also talk about the repair moves that bring you closer instead of pushing you apart, which is something that Tom and I have definitely used over a 25 year relationship. You're not going to want to miss that. And then finally go over how to make sure that your partner actually hears you loud and clear without even raising your voice. Because I'm telling you, if you have to raise your voice, you've already lost. So if you're ready to stop having the same old freaking arguments
1:48.5	over and over and over again, and you're actually wanting to start building something
1:52.2	freaking stronger and more beautiful, then let's dive in right now with Dr. Julie Gottman.
1:57.3	So you talk about you've got the masters and a disasters. So what are three things that a disaster person does? And then what is the opposite that a master does? A disaster is going to probably practice what we call the four horsemen of the apocalypse a lot. Criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and
2:19.2	stonewalling. They're going to be doing all of that. Can you give me one example of each?
	...

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