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Almost 30

597. The Origins of You: Understand the Root of Your Wounds + Behavior

Almost 30

Krista Williams & Lindsey Simcik

Alternative Health, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Education

4.5 • 4K Ratings

🗓️ 2 May 2023

⏱️ 106 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

It’s no surprise to the Almost 30 community that your childhood trauma and wounds can shape your adult life. Vienna Pharaon knows this all too well. A licensed marriage and family therapist, and one of New York City’s most sought-after relationship therapists, she has practiced therapy for more than fifteen years and is the founder and owner of the group practice Mindful Marriage and Family Therapy.  Today, she joins Krista on the show to discuss her first book, The Origins of You. It doesn’t matter whether you’ve been in therapy for decades, or if therapy just isn’t for you. It doesn’t matter if you have countless memories from childhood, or none at all. All that matters is having a willingness to look inside, dig deep, and commit to building the life you want.  In this episode, Krista and Vienna discuss how to fully understand the family dynamics and dysfunctions that created what she calls “origin wounds,” as well as the practical work needed to heal our wounds and leave behind the limiting beliefs and behaviors that don’t serve us. We also talk about: Why the “firsts” in your life are important Understanding your family patterns  Remembering your childhood wounds  Fear about recalling the past  What it means to be hypervigilant Living in victim mentality + avoiding healing How there will always be a need to heal + grow  Examples of people unpacking their wounds Resources: Instagram: @mindfulmft    Facebook: Mindful Marriage and Family Therapy Book: The Origins of You Sponsors: Vive Organic | Visit viveorganic.com and use code ALMOST30 at checkout for 15% off your first product. Osea | Get 10% off your first order sitewide with code ALMOST30 at OSEAMalibu.com Storyworth | Save $10 on your first purchase when you go to Storyworth.com/almost30 Daily Harvest | Go to dailyharvest.com/almost30 to get up to sixty-five dollars off your first box Cozy Earth | Get 35% off site wide when you use the code ALMOST30 at cozyearth.com To advertise on our podcast, please reach out to sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://www.advertisecast.com/Almost30.  Learn more: almost30.com/learn almost30.com/morningmicrodose almost30.com/courses  Join our community: almost30.com/membership facebook.com/Almost30podcast/groups Podcast disclaimer can be found by visiting: almost30.com/disclaimer.  Find more to love at almost30.com! Almost 30 is edited by Marielle Marlys. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

Welcome to the Almost 30 Podcast. I'm Lindsay and I'm Krista and we're your hosts, guides and friends on this path.

0:07.0

Almost 30 is not about your age, it's about the feeling. All of us are almost something seeking community and resources to support the rumblings of transformation within us.

0:17.0

Our conversations are deep dives, shepherded by our insatiable curiosity and desire for connection and during inspiration and a sense of levity that we can all benefit from.

0:28.0

We're looking to find the magic in the human experience. Buckle up baby, your evolution is waiting.

0:35.0

You're now tuned into almost 30 Podcast. How does it feel? How do you feel today? Oh, let's check in.

0:45.0

Running a mile a minute. Need to catch a break. We got you. We truly got you. Here at Almost 30, we're a place where we're going to be.

0:57.0

We're at a place where we laugh a lot. We learn a ton and we hope that you can find some comfort and peace in our own stories and just the exploration that we decide to embark on.

1:14.0

We could say that we live laugh, love. We live laugh, love. You could say that we are in our studio. We have a meal in our studio.

1:23.0

Yes. Laffers and lovers of all things truly. This is going to be a great, great, great episode. I'm really excited that you're here here at Almost 30. If you're new, we talk a lot about healing.

1:36.0

We talk a lot about spirituality. We talk about wellness. We share our stories and we try and be really open and real and honest with you and this conversation with Vienna.

1:45.0

And Farronon is going to be incredible. It was she and I that got to sit down and talk a lot about her book. The origins of you, which I've now read and so many topics and parts of it.

1:58.0

I felt like we're so relevant for our journey for the journey of our community. And I think this conversation is going to be so, so helpful for you and understanding your origins.

2:07.0

And support yourself in living a life that you love. Yeah. I think it's something that's a little bit difficult for us in like a modern world where there's so much emphasis and so much energy moving forward.

2:19.0

So it's on the next thing, the big goal, the big dream, the big vision and what you need to do next in order to achieve that. And I think therapy has really been so helpful for both of us in realizing that in order to unlock the next step or the next step.

2:36.0

Or the next opportunity or even the next version or level of ourselves. We must explore the past. And it doesn't mean we have to live there. It doesn't mean we have to like just sit in our own shit for a long time. It really just means having the awareness, having the compassion for what's been running in the background and basically driving our decisions without us even knowing.

3:04.0

So I think going back can catapult us forward in a very, very real way and give you the momentum that maybe you've been searching for 100% and Vienna actually so she did a workshop in a community that I'm in a year ago.

3:21.0

And I remember her workshop was so powerful. And so to see her now, you know, doing this book and writing this book, I was really excited to just be with her in person.

3:30.0

And it's so interesting because I have a friend, a dear friend of ours that's so progressive and advanced. And I remember we were recording a podcast and she was talking about something that's coming up for her. And I was like, Oh, well, what happened in your childhood or what happened back then to potentially lead to this, this thing that you're experiencing. She's like, I don't really do that. I don't really think that, you know, that's what it is. I'm like, interesting.

3:55.0

And then we were hanging out. And then two hours later, she tells me the story of her parents or something that like completely led perfectly to this thing she was experiencing. I was like, I wish I was qualified.

4:05.0

But we can always see people stuff clear than our own, you know what I mean. And when you're looking for that, but I'm really grateful that I had the challenge that I had with my mom and healing the mother wound and really learning to find gratitude and reverence for our relationship because that anger and frustration actually gave me the opportunity to do that.

4:24.0

And actually gave me the opportunity to find a place to place blame. So I never had a problem with finding out what my parents had done to me.

4:34.0

It's almost like in the victim mentality. So I'm actually grateful that I wasn't someone that was like, my childhood was perfect. Everything was fine.

...

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