497: How to Deal With Emotionally Immature People (Including Maybe Your Own Parents) | Lindsay C. Gibson

10% Happier with Dan Harris

10% Media, LLC

Dan Harris, Health & Fitness, Mindfulness, Dharma, Mental Health, Meditation

4.6 • 12.2K Ratings

🗓️ 12 September 2022

⏱️ 70 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Emotionally immature people (EIP’s) are hard to avoid and most of us, if not all of us, have to deal with them at some point in our lives. These interactions can range from mildly annoying to genuinely traumatic, especially if the emotionally immature people in question are our own parents, which is true for an awful lot of us.

Today’s guest, clinical psychologist Lindsay C. Gibson, gives advice for dealing with emotionally immature people, whether they’re your parents or not. She has written a sleeper hit book on the subject called, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents.

In this episode we talk about:

The signs of emotional immaturity
Whether or not I’m emotionally immature
What happens to children who are raised by emotionally immature parents, including their signature coping strategies
Why adult children of EIP’s turn to healing fantasies, and how to let them go
How to cope with emotionally immature parents as an adult
What role compassion should and should not play in your relationship with EIP’s
How to heal

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Transcript

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0:00.0	This is the 10% happier podcast.
0:06.3	I'm Dan Harris.
0:10.3	Hey, everybody.
0:12.8	They are hard to avoid.
0:14.7	I am talking here about emotionally immature people.
0:19.5	Most of us, if not all of us, have to deal with them.
0:22.1	These interactions can range from mildly annoying to genuinely traumatic, especially if the
0:28.8	emotionally immature people in question are our own parents, which is true for an awful
0:34.7	lot of us.
0:36.4	My guest today has written a sleeper-hit book on this subject with more than 10,000 five-star
0:42.0	reviews on Amazon.
0:44.2	Lindsay C. Gibson is a clinical psychologist and the author of adult children of emotionally
0:50.4	immature parents among other books.
0:53.4	And just to be super clear from the outset here, she has advice in this interview for dealing
0:57.5	with emotionally immature people, whether they're your parents or not.
1:01.5	Maybe it's your boss, maybe it's your spouse or a childhood friend, whatever.
1:05.4	In this conversation, we talk about the signs of emotional immaturity, whether or not
1:11.1	I am emotionally immature.
1:12.6	I couldn't help but ask her because once she described the signs or the symptoms, I
1:16.6	started to see myself and some of them.
1:18.9	We talk about what happens to children who are raised by emotionally immature parents,
1:22.8	including the signature coping strategies of many of these children, why adult children
	...

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