477. I'm dating a man 17 years older, how do I get my family to accept? + I'm terrified to lose my best friend to a relationship - Head Noise

Do You F*cking Mind?

Alexis Fernandez-Preiksa - Neuroscientist and Mindset Coach

Mental Health, Health & Fitness, Education, Self-improvement

4.9 • 915 Ratings

🗓️ 24 February 2026

⏱️ 30 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Head Noise: I’m Losing My Best Friend & My Partner Is 17 Years Older Than Me

In this Head Noise episode, we talk about two situations that can quietly reshape your relationships — friendship change and family judgement.

First, how do you deal with the fear of losing your best friend when they enter a new relationship?

We explore:

Why the friendship changing doesn’t mean the love is gone
How trying to control or hold on too tightly can push someone away
The difference between close and codependent friendships
Why fear can damage something that doesn’t need fixing
How to genuinely be happy for your friend when their life evolves

Then, what happens when your partner is 17 years older and your family isn’t on board?

i go into:

Learning to live with family disappointment
Why their concern often comes from protection, not rejection
The importance of keeping them in the loop
Why telling them sooner rather than later makes things easier

This episode is about allowing relationships to evolve without trying to force certainty, and learning to stay grounded even when others don’t fully understand your choices.

As always, Head Noise is about responding thoughtfully instead of reacting from fear.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

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0:00.0	When was the last time you had space to feel?
0:04.4	With the National Trust, you might just find life standing still under towering trees.
0:10.8	Maybe you'll find connection among the stories of the past.
0:15.6	Or a moment to disconnect from it all on a mountainside.
0:20.3	Whatever you're feeling, wherever you are, with the National Trust, you can make space to feel.
0:43.6	Hello, beautiful beans and welcome to the head noise episode of today.
0:45.5	So this is an email head noise.
0:47.9	You guys know the fucking drill.
0:49.6	You guys send me in an email.
0:53.8	I read out your email and we break down what's going on in your head. Okay.
0:56.1	We are addressing the head noise in your head. Okay. I have a nice array of different topics that we're going to cover today. I've got
1:01.5	three. I've got one about age gut relationships. I've got one about a close friendship where there's
1:08.9	that fear that one of them gets into a relationship,
1:11.2	what's going to happen to the friendship.
1:12.9	I've also got one about prioritising, you know, big career moves
1:16.7	over other things that are more, you know, timeline sensitive.
1:19.7	So I think this is something that really can resonate with so many of us.
1:23.7	I literally, I was like, I actually resonate with, you know, a bunch of things on this
1:29.6	episode. So I'm very excited to actually read them and break it down with you guys. So, without
1:36.1	further ado, let's get straight into the first question. Hi, Alexis. I'm a huge fan of your podcast.
1:42.7	Found it because of the rebrand and glow up mini series. Thank you. I love it.
1:46.6	I know when people find me on the miniseries. And since then I've listened to your podcast religiously.
	...

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