#461 How To Stop the Hurt (When Others Hurt You)
Happiness Podcast
Dr. Robert Puff, Ph.D.
4.4 • 920 Ratings
🗓️ 15 December 2023
⏱️ 14 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
How To Stop the Hurt (When Others Hurt You)
When someone hurts you, it's natural to want to lash out and hurt them back. However, this reaction is often counterproductive and can lead to more hurt and conflict. Here are some strategies you can use to resist the urge to retaliate when someone has wronged you:
Acknowledge your feelings. It's important to acknowledge your hurt and anger. Don't try to suppress your emotions, as this can lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms. Allow yourself to feel your feelings, but don't let them control you.
Take some time to cool down. Before you react, take some time to calm down. This will help you think more clearly and avoid saying or doing something you'll regret later. Try taking some deep breaths, going for a walk, or doing another activity that helps you relax.
Consider the situation. Try to see things from the other person's perspective. Why did they hurt you? Was it intentional or unintentional? Was it a one-time thing or part of a larger pattern? Understanding the other person's motivations can help you react with more compassion.
Focus on communication. Once you've calmed down, talk to the person who hurt you about how you're feeling. Explain what they did that hurt you and how it made you feel. Be honest and assertive, but avoid accusatory language. The goal is to understand the situation and find a way to resolve the conflict.
Practice forgiveness. Forgiveness doesn't mean condoning the other person's behavior or forgetting what they did. It means letting go of your anger and resentment so that you can move on. Forgiveness is a process, and it takes time. Be patient with yourself and allow yourself to forgive at your own pace.
Seek support. Talk to a trusted friend, family member, therapist, or counselor about what you're going through. They can offer you support and guidance as you work through your feelings.
Focus on your well-being. Taking care of yourself is important during difficult times. Make sure you're getting enough sleep, eating healthy foods, and exercising regularly. You should also do things that you enjoy, such as spending time with loved ones or pursuing your hobbies.
New Happiness Podcast episode with Dr. Robert Puff, Newport Beach Psychologist
🎧 Listen to all Episodes of the Happiness Podcast NOW! https://www.HappinessPodcast.org
💛 Do you ever wonder what it takes to lead a peaceful, happy life? Are you curious about the specific steps involved in a self-actualized, limitless life? Are you struggling with anxiety or depression? Or are you just plain tired and want some help?
➡️ I explore all these concerns and more every week on the Happiness Podcast, which has been downloaded over 17 million times since its inception. Happiness does not happen by chance, it happens when we take specific actions in our lives to create it
💯 Welcome to my channel! My name is Dr. Robert Puff, Ph.D. I am an author of 13 books, I am a TV show host, Psychology Today blogger, and corporate trainer. I have been studying the actions it takes to reach the highest levels of human achievement for decades, and I would love to share what I've learned with you! My Happiness Podcast is entirely free to listen to, so why not give it a try!
➡️ So, come and explore the Happiness Podcast, my books, and Psychology Today blog, the specific steps to take so that you can soar in your life!
*************
✅ Follow Dr. Robert Puff and the Happiness Podcast on social media:
Instagram ▶️ https://www.instagram.com/robertpuffjr/
LinkedIn ▶️ https://www.linkedin.com/in/doctorpuff
Twitter ▶️ https://twitter.com/HappinesPodcast
Facebook ▶️ https://www.facebook.com/HappinessPodcast/
📧 Email Dr. Robert Puff: [email protected]
📞 Contact Dr. Robert Puff: 1-714-337-4889
📲 WhatsApp Dr. Robert Puff: 1-714-337-4889
✅ Dr. Puff, Clinical Psychologist: https://www.DoctorPuff.com
� Music: By Kevin MacLeod
#howtostopthehurt #happiness #happinesspodcast #howtobehappy #happy #happinessisachoice #happinessisaninsidejob #enlightenment #drrobertpuff #stressmanagement #findyourhappiness #becomehappy #happinesscomesfromwithin #happinessiswhereyouare #happinessisbeautiful #HappinessYouDeserve #happinessallaroundme #happinessjourney #createyourhappiness #happyyou #pursuityourhappiness #clinicalpsychologist #drrobertpuff #happinesscomesfromwithin #HappinessPodcast #newportbeachpsychologist
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the happiness podcast. I'm Dr. Robert Puff. None of us get through life without being hurt by someone else. The question is, what do we do with that hurt? |
| 0:20.4 | When I was in my first year of university, I had a class, an art class, and so there was a lot of time just to sit and talk as we were doing projects. |
| 0:30.0 | Well, one of the guys in the class that I didn't know shared a story how his roommate had really |
| 0:35.7 | taken advantage of him and it hurt him. |
| 0:38.3 | It hurt him a lot. |
| 0:39.3 | It made him mad. |
| 0:40.5 | It made him upset. |
| 0:41.5 | And it just really bothered him. I don't remember the exact details of what his roommate did, but he had to find a new roommate and get a new place, which he did. |
| 0:51.0 | I thought what had happened to him was sad and I felt sorry for him that he |
| 0:55.2 | had to go through that ordeal. But then towards the end of the semester something really |
| 1:00.4 | strange happened that surprised me. He ended up getting in a similar situation. something really I was really surprised by it because I knew how much had heard him when his roommate did that to him. |
| 1:16.0 | So I asked him about it and he said, well, that's just the way life is and now he'll learn his lessons like I had to learn mine. I was very surprised by his |
| 1:25.4 | response because he was so open about it and yet I knew it caused him so much pain |
| 1:30.6 | when it happened to him so why would he do it to another person? And over the years I've seen this |
| 1:36.3 | response many many times as I'm sure you have too. Where someone is hurt and |
| 1:41.2 | they go on and hurt someone else because they were hurt. |
| 1:44.8 | And often not the person that hurt them, but just another random person that hurt, |
| 1:50.2 | because they have hurt inside of them. |
| 1:53.0 | One of the saddest examples I ever saw this |
| 1:56.0 | is when I was asked by another professional |
| 1:59.0 | who was leading a support group for teenagers |
| 2:02.0 | that had been molested by a family member and |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Dr. Robert Puff, Ph.D., and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Dr. Robert Puff, Ph.D. and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2025.