You're listening to Self Work and I'm Dr. Margaret.

Today we'll talk about how to get over the feeling that you're not important.

But first, here's a message from our sponsors.

This is Self Work and I'm Dr. Margaret Rutherford.

At Self-Work, we discuss psychological and emotional issues and what you can do about them,

whether that's learning self-acceptance, taking action, or seeking therapy or treatment.

Eight years ago, I extended the walls of my practice to reach those of you who might already be knowledgeable about middle health treatment, but also to those of you who might say you'd never darken the door of a therapist.

And yet, you are here. I'll answer your questions while I invite you to take a few minutes for your own self-work.

I'm a big fan of journaling, and I. I'm a big fan of journaling, and I know a lot of people don't like it.

I realize that, but I still argue there's something very powerful about putting your thoughts

and feelings down in black and white.

It's you on that page.

And frankly, that's what's kind of scary about it. Welcome to this week's edition of self-work. Today we're going to focus on the

damage that happens if a parent gave you the message that you simply weren't important to them.

You can get this message in a lot of ways.

Maybe their career came first.

The parents themselves came first for one another,

only caring for the child as a secondhand and almost bothersome activity.

Your being wasn't celebrated.

Instead, what you could achieve got notice

as long as you continue to be successful.

Your parent was overly self-involved because of their

...