I'll be honest, I didn't read a single parenting book.

I just thought, you know what, when she comes, I'll know what to do.

I'm just laughing at the very hopeful, when she comes, I'll know what to do.

I'll figure it.

How hard can it be?

And I was struggling.

I was really, really struggling.

I needed every bit of sleep that I could get.

For me, the schedule does work because then it gives me predictability into my day and we're six weeks

in to having a newborn baby i feel like my whole life's up in shambles of like what what's my day

look like yeah that was really powerful for me i also think it's pretty shitty when um people

pretend they don't have help and they're doing it all on their own and I'm like I'm not going to pretend that

because I did have help from a very from noemi's very early age and I want to be really honest about

that because I absolutely do not want any mum comparing themselves to me thinking that I'm maybe

handling it better or whatever yeah absolutely not I I had help and anything, that is something that's always made me feel

worse, like not knowing that someone's actually having help, but they're making out that they don't.

And then I'm comparing myself thinking like, well, they're doing it all. Why can't I do it all?

But we don't have family here where I can just call up my mom and be like, hey, mom, I'm really

struggling today. Could you come around and watch the be like, hey, mum, I'm really struggling

today. Could you come around and watch the baby for half an hour? So I do also just think that's

worth bringing up as well where there's an extra factor here of not actually having support

around you naturally. So having to really call in that extra team support a little bit more.

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