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Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

#420: "I Have No Sex Drive!" Dr. Ruth's Advice For Reigniting Intimacy

Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Marriage, Mental Health, Success, Emotionalintelligence, Selfhelp, Wellness, Mentalhealth, Selfimprovement, Career, Health, Society & Culture, Careerdevelopment, Mindfulness, Lifeadvice, Dating, Parenting, Breakups, Relationships, Productivity, Positive, Happiness, Goals, Health & Fitness, Communication

4.6849 Ratings

🗓️ 23 September 2024

⏱️ 23 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Let’s get real for a minute—have you ever found yourself thinking, "I have no sex drive," and feeling completely stuck about what to do next? You’re not alone. So many people are struggling with this exact issue, and today, I’m diving deep into why that happens, how it affects your relationship, and most importantly—what you can do about it.

In this episode, I’m joined by Allison Gilbert, co-author with the iconic Dr. Ruth Westheimer on her last book "The Joy of Connections." We’ll explore how a lack of intimacy in your relationship can leave you feeling lost, but we’re also unpacking Dr. Ruth’s brilliant “menu for connection.” It’s full of ways to reignite your bond—not just in the bedroom, but through shared activities, better communication, and ultimately, deeper self-reflection.

We’ll tackle some tough love truths (like the role self-love plays in intimacy), and I’ll share actionable strategies to help you reconnect with your partner, starting today.

Episode Breakdown:

[00:00] – Where’s the Spark?
Why so many people feel disconnected from their partners—and how it happens more often than you think.

[00:47] – Dr. Ruth’s Secret Sauce
The first thing to check when your sex drive is gone—your relationship dynamics!

[02:09] – It’s Not Them, It’s You?
The surprising role self-love plays in keeping intimacy alive.

[03:47] – The “Menu for Connection”
Five elements Dr. Ruth swears by to build a richer, more meaningful connection with your partner.

[05:47] – Fun Outside the Bedroom
How activities like pickleball (yes, pickleball!) could reignite the flames of passion.

[08:06] – What’s Really Going On?
Digging deeper: how emotional barriers like resentment might be blocking your connection.

[12:41] – Therapy or Time to Move On?
When it’s time to seek help—or even consider a bigger decision.

[15:41] – You Deserve Better
Dr. Ruth’s empowering message: You deserve happiness, fun, and great sex—don’t settle for less.

[17:16] – Let’s Wrap This Up!
Final thoughts and inspiration to help you take that first step toward a better, more intimate relationship.

Tune in, share your thoughts, and let’s create a life full of love, connection, and fun together!

 

Xoxo,
Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

 

P.S. ⭐ Ready for more? ⭐
Download my free guide, "Communication that Connects," to start having meaningful conversations that build closeness in your relationship. And don’t forget to join me for this week’s live stream on Thursday at 12 PM MT—we’ll dive even deeper into intimacy and connection. Submit your anonymous questions ahead of time right here!

P. P.S: Who else in your life needs to hear this message today? Forward this episode to them and feel good about being a positive “change agent” in the lives of others. You and I are on the same mission my friend! Xo, L

 

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Have you ever found yourself lying in bed next to your partner, but feeling miles apart and

0:06.3

wondering, why don't I have any desire anymore?

0:11.5

If you're nodding along, you're not alone.

0:14.0

In today's episode, we're digging into that question.

0:17.2

That one really wants to talk about but so many of us are facing, which is what

0:21.9

happens when your sex drive just disappears? Or what do you do if your partner's sex

0:28.0

drive disappears, am I right? And more importantly, on either side, what can you do about it?

0:34.5

If you are ready for some real talk about this delicate topic and also some

0:40.7

actionable steps to reignate the intimacy in your relationship, you are in the right place. Bringing us in today is a really cool remix of that Canon song, Fire for you, for obvious reasons.

1:04.9

This is the DJ Genesis version, which I really like, and I'm happy to share it with you today.

1:11.4

If this is your first time listening, welcome to love happiness and success. I'm Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby. I'm a licensed

1:16.6

marriage and family therapist, a licensed psychologist, a board certified coach. And this is love

1:20.7

happiness and success, where growth-oriented people like you, like me, come together to talk

1:26.8

about how we evolve into the kinds of people

1:30.3

we want to be and have the kinds of lives that we want to have.

1:33.9

So we'll roll right into this today, but I do want to share.

1:38.0

This is an interview I recorded and we had some weird little audio problems on my guest's side, which you may hear.

1:48.5

And I came close to like, oh, is this too hard?

1:52.3

The audio quality is a little bit dicey in some places.

1:55.0

But I chose to release it anyway because it's really packed full of very good information that I think will be helpful to you.

2:01.6

So I just wanted to share that ahead of time so that you have a little bit of grace with me and

2:08.8

with her and don't let any little blips or, you know, espresso machines going in the

...

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