343: Narcissist Survival Guide with Dr. Ramani Durva-Sula
Age Less / Live More
Lucas Rockwood
4.8 • 1.1K Ratings
🗓️ 23 January 2019
⏱️ 47 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Open up Instagram right now, and start counting the number of narcissists in your feed today. How many? Three, ten, fifty? Is there anyone real in your feed?
Narcissistic personalities have always existed, but with social media, it's a bigger problem than ever. These hyper-insecure people lack empathy, live in a constant state of conflict, and value status and outward appearances over real human connection and understanding.
Why does it matter? Because we work with them, we live with them, and in some cases, we even marry and spend our lives with them. In this week's podcast, you'll meet a clinical psychologist who shares her pragmatic and down-to-earth approach to living with or running from the narcissists in your life.
Listen & Learn:
- How to identify a narcissist.
- Why the stereotypical "successful man" today is often the definition of a narcissist.
- Realistic outlook of change (hint: low to none).
- Should you stay, or should you go?
Links & Resources:
ABOUT OUR GUEST
Dr. Ramani Durvasula is a licensed clinical psychologist. She has a private practice in Santa Monica and Sherman Oaks, CA. She is a professor of psychology at Cal State Los Angeles where she was named "Outstanding Professor" in 2012. She is also a visiting professor at the University of Johannesburg.
She is the author of two books: Should I Stay or Should I Go: Surviving a Relationship With a Narcissist (Post Hill Press), and You Are WHY You Eat: Change Your Food Attitude, Change Your Life. She has appeared on nearly every major television network, as well as radio, print, and internet platforms.
Nutritional Tip of the Week:
- Potatoes
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | They say that the quality of your life is determined by the quality of your relationships |
| 0:08.8 | and I think this is true and I also think it's something that I've ignored for a great part of my life. |
| 0:15.1 | I put a huge emphasis on my own health. I put a huge emphasis on my own learning and growth on my |
| 0:20.9 | business. And for many many many years I really neglected personal |
| 0:24.1 | relationships to my own detriment and if you look at the trajectory of most people |
| 0:29.8 | living in a modern world it's very similar to mine after the age of 40 most people have |
| 0:34.0 | something like one friend and most people have severed or pretty distant |
| 0:38.1 | relationships with their immediate family and maybe even adversarial |
| 0:42.1 | relationships with their immediate family or their in-laws. |
| 0:45.8 | And this is not how humans are designed to live. |
| 0:48.9 | We're social beings. |
| 0:49.9 | If you look at |
| 0:55.0 | historically how humans developed and how societies were formed. |
| 0:56.0 | You know, it was up at Luck Ness a couple years ago |
| 0:59.0 | and I remember there's this castle right on Luckness |
| 1:01.0 | and something crazy, like 1500 people smashed into this |
| 1:05.1 | tiny castle the castle grounds you know and it just made me realize that there's still |
| 1:09.8 | so much space up there's just an abundance of land. |
| 1:13.0 | Why would all these people cram in there? |
| 1:14.5 | Well, that's where the food was. |
| 1:15.4 | That's where the kitchen was. |
| 1:16.3 | That's where the leathermaker was. |
... |
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