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How Long Gone

328. - Andy Haynes

How Long Gone

Chris Black & Jason Stewart / Talkhouse

Society & Culture

4.41.1K Ratings

🗓️ 13 April 2022

⏱️ 69 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Andy Haynes is a stand-up comedian from Seattle, currently living in New York. Watch his current special, "The Coward of Gramercy," here. We chat about Chris' hate of car racing, the HVAC baton has been passed, allergy season, Andy has never written on a TV show that he'd want to tell people about, Chanel Westcoast, meeting chicks at Equinox and immediately paying their rent, Andy's barista career, TJ used to heckle stand up shows, did podcasts or Tik Tok ruin comedy? Andy's wife got hired to roast a San Diego Billionaire, Andy used to smoke hotties out for a hug, he's married into political royalty, how people consume comedy now, the hills of Seattle, and Andy pitches Chris for some light copywriting work. instagram.com/imandyhaynes twitter.com/donetodeath twitter.com/themjeans Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

And the Okay, we're recording, then jeans. What's really going on?

0:18.0

Oh, you know, I'm feeling much better, not super sick anymore, and just so I got one more day of some flam.

0:26.0

But otherwise I'm just over here taking it easy, just, I'm doing all the stuff on my to-do from like you know eight months ago that I was just like never going to do

0:36.4

Oh, I would love to I would love to hear some of this important stuff that's that's kind of made on that list if you don't mind sharing

0:41.8

No, none of it none of it is important.

0:44.3

And that's the reason why it just sits on the list,

0:46.4

you know, like move this box of clothes to the garage

0:50.1

or, you know, just like dumb shit where you're just like,

0:52.3

I'm gonna do that and you never do it

0:53.6

I wouldn't know I wouldn't know anything about that I accomplished tasks you know

0:56.9

ASAP there's no there's no time for waiting well I have the time because I'm under the

1:01.9

weather you know I understand I understand

1:04.1

Normally I'm accomplishing so many tasks when I'm firing from all the cylinders but that's true I got three

1:10.0

cylinders tops I understand yeah yes you're working with some some engines have more but you're working with three you're comfortable with that is what you're saying at the moment I am oh I see I see I see

1:20.2

after after I hit the pit crew oh Oh this kid will be purin v 12 no problem you're more of a four banger and that's cool for you.

1:27.5

I don't want you to lap me that would be that would be a problem so I need to make sure that my cylinders are

1:32.1

one more reference and I'll have to I'll have to bring up Ford v Ferrari yet again

1:36.8

No, don't know. Please God. Please God don't do that. Well no now that now that every you know white guy who drives like a mid-range sedan is

1:46.4

obsessed with F1 you know it's just another it's another hell for us to try to

1:52.3

escape you first first I hear about golf and now It's another hell for us to try to escape.

1:52.8

You first, first I hear about golf

1:54.8

and now I have to hear about cars going around in circles.

...

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