Welcome to the Autism, ADHD podcast. I am so happy that you join me today. I want to take a moment and ask for your help. Please take just a second and give the podcast a five-star review. This will help me continue the podcast and keep bringing you helpful

information. Thanks so much again for taking the time to give that five-star review. Now let's get

started. Today we're talking about three ways to crush unhelpful expectations. Do you find yourself thinking or saying

he or she should be able to or has to or needs to? Do you find yourself expecting that your

child should do what you say the first time you tell him. Do you find yourself expecting that your student

should just be able to stay quiet and seated during instruction? Are you a therapist?

And you've taught your clients so many great coping strategies, but they aren't using them

during times of overwhelm.

Anytime there's a gap between your expectation and what the child actually does, you may

find yourself experiencing feelings of anxiety, frustration, or maybe even anger.

Here's another example. If you expect your student to complete

the math worksheet during math class, and they only do half of one problem, you may feel

frustrated because obviously there's a gap between your expectation and what the child actually did. Now, what that means is

you are human. So welcome to the club. We all have expectations and ideas of what should happen.

All humans do. But here's the thing. Expectations not only lead to stress for us, but also tear down children.

Unhelpful expectations lead us nowhere. So, you know, what do we do about that? How do we address this

problem? First, we need to gently notice the expectation

just with curiosity, without judgment, without criticism of ourselves. We're just going to gently

notice it. Notice the feelings and thoughts that come up when you have an expectation the child doesn't meet it.

Practice again using curiosity.

Notice when you're experiencing that anxiety and frustration I was talking about.

It's hard to do, but the more you practice, the better you'll get.

...