3 Questions to Ask Yourself After an Argument: Episode 193
EmPowered Couples with The Freemans
Aaron & Jocelyn Freeman
5.0 • 589 Ratings
🗓️ 30 September 2021
⏱️ 12 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Register for the LAST FREE WebClass in 2021 happening October 5th. It will cover strategies for preventing conflict, de-escalating triggers, and repairing after conflict. Save your seats here.
There are some misconceptions about resolving conflicts in a relationship. What doesn't actually resolve anything is trying to jump right to a solution, or distracting yourself long enough where the high level of emotion has subsided. This will only build into resentment or at a minimum, start to seed disconnection and discontent within the relationship.
In today's podcast episode you'll hear:
- The 3 questions to ask yourself to actually start the repair process and not have lingering emotions get stored up for you to react to later.
Resources For Your Relationship:
Order our book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts (like the mini course and a 90 minute training)
About Us:
We're The Freemans, your go-to couple for authentic and actionable relationship advice. Send us your relationship questions for the show with a DM on Instagram. As you listen to the episode, tag us on an IG story and let us know what you loved.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hello and welcome to the Empowered Couples podcast where you get modern, non-boring relationship |
| 0:05.3 | advice for you and your partner to communicate like pros, fight smarter, and stay on the same team |
| 0:10.6 | no matter the challenge that you face. I'm one of your host, Erin Freeman. And I'm Jocelyn Freeman, |
| 0:14.7 | but you all just know us as the Freeman's. And this quick motivational episode here is about |
| 0:20.1 | three questions to ask yourself after an argument. |
| 0:23.1 | After an argument is sometimes just as important as during the argument. |
| 0:28.3 | And Tuesday's episode was about some of the mid-conflict behaviors that cause damage. |
| 0:34.2 | The after-conflict stage, you guys, is so important. |
| 0:38.6 | And what you don't want to do is miss out on an opportunity because all you do is distract |
| 0:44.2 | yourself. |
| 0:44.9 | You get on your phone, you scroll, you watch a movie, you do something with the kids. |
| 0:50.0 | And then you just let a few days pass. |
| 0:52.4 | And then you're like, I think they're over it. I mean, |
| 0:55.2 | they seem okay. I think, I don't know, maybe I'm over it. And you're not sure. But really, |
| 1:00.4 | there's things lingering. And so this after conflict stage is really important. And a big part of it |
| 1:07.2 | is like this internal reflection and dialogue that you have with yourself. |
| 1:12.4 | Well, let's share two things to get this really clear. |
| 1:15.8 | When we say resolve an argument, especially if you've read the argument hangover, |
| 1:20.7 | we're talking about resolving it emotionally for both you and your partner. |
| 1:26.1 | So what this does not mean, resolving does not mean that you just get to a solution to move on. |
| 1:33.2 | Like a logical solution. |
| 1:35.0 | Or any action, any, this is what we should do instead. |
... |
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