Welcome to the Romance of the Three Kingdoms podcast.

This is episode 80.

Last time, Liu Bei lost Master Young Phoenix, Pang Tong, to an ambush, so he had to ask Zhuge Liang to come to the

riverlands to bail him out. Zhuge Liang left Guan Yu in charge of Jing province and set off.

He sent Zhang Fei along the main land route while he himself traveled by water with the

General Zhao Yun.

Zhang Fei had little trouble from the locals until he reached Ba County,

where a stubborn general named Yan Yan dared to stand in his way.

So Zhang Fei sent a messenger to Yan Yan,

and this messenger conveyed the following sentiments from Zhang Fei.

Old fool, if you hurry up and surrender, then I will spare your civilians.

If you resist, then I will stomp your city flat and leave no one, not even the old and the

young.

This messenger probably did not make it very far past the old fool part before Yan Yan blew his lid.

How dare the bastard be so rude! I am not one to submit to traitors!

But Yan Yan did not shoot the messenger, since beheading was the preferred form of execution during this time.

But seriously, Yan actually allowed the messenger to keep his head.

I will use you to deliver my message back to Zhang Fei, he said.

But while the messenger got to keep his head, he was not able to keep everything on his head.

Yan Yan ordered his guards to cut off the guy's ears and nose before letting him go. The poor schmuck, now earless and noseless, scampered back to

Zhang Fei in tears and told him what happened and what Yan Yan has said. Zhang Fei took this

quite well and said,

...