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Dr Naysle. The engine roars as I press the gas pedal to the floor.

Hold on! I shout as we approach a gated entrance to Area 51, doing a good 80 miles an hour.

I peer out a small 6 inch by 6 inch window

in the windshield, just above the steering wheel.

Every other part of the windshield is covered in ballistic vests, which we taped around the inside of the SUV to protect us from bullets.

We'd spent a small fortune on enough vests to cover all the windows, plus one for each of us to wear.

It's relatively cool inside the SUV, partially thanks to the vests blocking the harsh desert

sunlight. Roy sits in the seat next to me, gripping the oh shit handle

above the window. His forearm flexes, distorting the tattoo of a bulbous-headed green alien there.

Roy's blue and white bandana covers the top of his head,

and his braided gray and brown goatee

hangs halfway down the ballistic vest he wears.

We look at each other, frightened grins on our faces.

Neither one of us can actually believe we're storming Area 51.

...