Hey guys, it's Dawn. I want to share some mini episodes with you each week to give you some bite-sized

insights into how to heal, new ways to think. Truth bombs, choices you can make for yourself I want to encourage you on your

healing journey I want to help you to see through these beautiful shares more of the truth and give you even more

inspiration to heal. I believe in you, you can do this, so here is one of our mini episodes. I hope it's helpful. Take a listen.

I started to date and when you start dating you kind of you know just want to be with your

boyfriend or you want to go hang out with your friends and you want to kind of not be around

your mother as much and I think my mom started to feel some abandonment issues here and she would start

lashing out in ways such as I remember one time she didn't believe where I was going so she showed up to the location

where I was and told me to go home even though I was where I was supposed to be.

She just was there's a lack of trust. There was a lack of communication. She just started, I think she started to feel that I was pulling away as a child. And you know that's what teenagers are supposed to do they're supposed to grow and it's the last phase of childhood and I think it was difficult for her to see her daughter growing up and doing things that adults or I wasn't an adult yet but I was you know well on my way to becoming more independent and she share her behavior became increasingly more volatile,

paranoid, insecure, and the way that she treated me was pretty bad.

It was not good.

And she had a husband at the time who was my stepdad and we left living there when I was around 16 and went to live with my grandparents again and my mom was living with my grandparents as well and that was around the time where I decided I didn't want to live with my mother anymore. I was done. She relied heavily on me during that time for emotional support and I was obviously a child and I didn't know at the time what that was called or how to put a label on it but it was

parentification I was being parentified by my mother and being told things and

confidence that I probably shouldn't have been told and relied on for emotional support and that kind of thing. And so I finally had it. I was done. I didn't want to live with her anymore. She was unstable at that time and I decided to go live with my dad and when I did that our relationship became increasingly worse because I was pulling further and further away from her.

It felt like I was her parents and she was my child even though at the time I didn't know what it felt like to be a parent but I felt like I was the stronger person emotionally and she relied heavily on me to be able to kind of be her confident and it felt very unsafe though. It felt very scary and

she would do things and I would be like mom don't do that because it's not good for you and you know no child should be put in that situation to where you'll you have to be parenting your mother, especially she was going through another divorce, her second divorce and it seemed like, you know, going through a divorce is obviously terrible and hard, but the circumstances around it were kind of bad as well.

So I think that that is when she kind of really started, really started to go downhill and really relied upon me for emotional support and it just yeah I felt

unsafe it felt scary it felt weird you know and no child really should have to do to

go through that.

It's incredibly toxic, isn't it?

When you, when you describe what she was doing on a daily basis,

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