For decades, women were told that if they wanted equality, they needed to lean in harder. Work more. Organize better. Choose better partners. Be more efficient.

And yet, here we are. More educated than ever. More present in the workforce than ever. And somehow… more exhausted.

My guest today says this isn’t a contradiction. It’s a data point. Dr. Corinne Low is a Wharton professor and an economist. She is the author of the new book, Having it All: What Data Tells Us About Women’s Lives and Getting the Most Out of Yours.

She has spent the last 15 years studying how women actually live — how we work, how we partner, how we parent, and how we divide time and labor inside our homes. And what her research shows is uncomfortable: while women’s careers have evolved dramatically, the structure of marriage and household labor has barely changed since the 1970s.

In this conversation, Corinne walks us through the data behind why modern women are so tired, why the mental load remains stubbornly unequal, and why cooking, cleaning, caregiving, and the invisible work of running a household still fall disproportionately on women — regardless of who brings home the bigger paycheck.

We talk about why “fair” isn’t always the right goal — and why sustainability, nourishment, and evidence-based decision making matter more. We dig into outsourcing, why women undervalue their time, and why we’re far more comfortable paying someone to change the oil than paying someone to make dinner.

And then there’s Corinne’s personal story, one that the media turned into a headline, but rarely explained well. After divorcing a man, Corinne remarried a woman. And in doing so, she experienced something unexpected: when gender stopped silently organizing the household, equality no longer had to be negotiated; it could be designed.

We talk candidly about what same-sex couples get right about partnership, what heterosexual couples can learn from that, and why true equality at home requires interrogating defaults — not just dividing tasks.

We also get into the bigger questions women are asking right now: when to have children, how motherhood reshapes careers, why women still take the professional hit for caregiving, and how AI and economic change may actually make women’s labor more — not less — essential in the future.

Learn more about Farnoosh's upcoming literary workshop Book to Brand. Early bird registration is now open!

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