1729: Doubting as a Mormon Missionary and in Early Marriage - Dallin Seely (@TheDashleys)
Mormon Stories Podcast
Dr. John Dehlin
4.6 • 5.2K Ratings
🗓️ 13 February 2023
⏱️ 197 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Dallin Seely from YouTube channel @TheDashleys grew up as a multigenerational Mormon. When he was seven years old, his father passed away from stomach cancer. Despite this tragedy, the church provided a lot of support to him and his family. The early death of his father leads Dallin to experience intense scrupulosity as he worries that he will never see his father again in heaven if he isn't "worthy" according to LDS Standards. A strict Bishop exacerbates Dallin’s scrupulosity but is somewhat alleviated when a new bishop tells him that his worthiness was not determined by others. Dallin went on a mission for the church and had a mix of positive and negative experiences. When he came home from his mission, he was encouraged to get married, but he continued to have doubts about the church's teachings, such as the priesthood ban for black members.
Dallin felt the Holy Ghost told him to marry a certain woman, but he falls in love with Ashley, another faithful woman but who seems a bit less "proper" to Dallin for things like expressing humor through sarcasm. Dallin follows his own heart and marries Ashley anway. The couple deals with the church’s inherent sexism, including in the temple and the teaching of “the patriarchal order” in the Mormon church. Continuous marriage struggles lead them to seek therapy. This led to the healthiest time in their marriage, as they were able to have emotional intimacy and talk about their feelings, including Ashley's feelings about General Conferences and sexism. They did not want to teach their daughter to feel inferior to men. They also talk about embracing their true selves and raising their children in a way that eliminates guilt and fear. They describe their understanding of the brain and how therapists aim to change relationships to thoughts and feelings, and not be enslaved by them.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hello everyone and welcome to another edition of Mormon Stories podcast. I am your host for today John Delin |
| 0:05.7 | It is January 31st |
| 0:08.4 | 2023 I am writing solo today with no co-host and |
| 0:13.3 | Today we are going to be talking about what happens as a young newly married Mormon with young kids |
| 0:21.9 | When you and your spouse start having a faith crisis |
| 0:25.2 | We're also going to be talking about scrupulosity or religious OCD or obsessive compulsive disorder and |
| 0:32.2 | perfectionism |
| 0:33.2 | We're going to be talking about kind of a young Mormon couple that has kind of a feminist awakening |
| 0:39.9 | But we're not actually interviewing the couple this time |
| 0:43.1 | We're interviewing the husband and the father in the young Mormon marriage and |
| 0:49.7 | And today we have with us in studio a face that may be familiar to some of you |
| 0:56.5 | His name is |
| 0:58.0 | Dalin Ceeley. Hey, Dalin welcome to Mormon Stories podcast studios. Hey John good to be here. Yeah |
| 1:05.0 | For those who don't know Dalin has another job kind of a day job |
| 1:08.9 | He and his wife run a YouTube channel called the dashlies. Yeah, right? |
| 1:13.8 | Yeah, dashlies. How do you describe kind of that content segment? It's like Mormon family |
| 1:19.0 | YouTube being your what is it? |
| 1:21.0 | Family lifestyle, I think it's kind of hard to describe. Yeah, I'd say family lifestyle slash couples |
| 1:28.4 | Yeah, lifestyle content. Yeah, and I'm not much a connoisseur of YouTube |
| 1:33.9 | So you know, but I have checked out several videos like your most recent one is like your son going to the dentist or something like that |
| 1:40.7 | Right. Oh, yeah, yeah, we do vlogs and then there's with TikTok now |
| 1:45.8 | We do a lot more short form content and you're and you're handled there is it's all the dashlies the dashes |
... |
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