163 - The Church of Satan

Timesuck with Dan Cummins

Dan Cummins

Religion, Society & Culture, Dark Humor, History, Adult Humor, Conspiracies, True Crime, Cults, Conspiracy, Comedy, Biographies, Education

4.8 • 22.4K Ratings

🗓️ 28 October 2019

⏱️ 167 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

The Church of Satan! How many babies do they sacrifice? Do the babies have to be Christian? How many virgins are presented to dudes wearing robes or devil horns or goat masks at their orgies? Do any of these questions actually pertain to real Satanism? Today we look mostly at LaVayen Satanism - the most common and well known branch of Satanic worship - and we look at its founder, Anton LaVey. Will your preconceived notions of what Satanism is supposed to be actually match the truth? You'll find out when you listen to today's Satanic episode of Timesuck. Hail Lucifina! Check out Lynze and I's new horror podcast Scared to Death. Listen on Spotify, Stitcher, iTunes, Youtube, and more! Here's the iTunes link: CLICK HERE Donating $3200 this month to the nonprofit - Holding Out Help. https://holdingouthelp.org/ Happy Murder Tour Standup dates: (full calendar at http://dancummins.tv) November 1-2 Columbus, OH Funny Bone Comedy Club CLICK HERE for tix! November 7-9 Denver, CO Comedy Works (downtown) CLICK HERE for tix! November 10 - Denver, CO LIVE TIMESUCK CLICK HERE for tix! November 21-23 Grand Rapids, MI Dr. Grins (at the B.O.B) CLICK HERE for tix! November 23 Grand Rapids, MI LIVE TIMESUCK CLICK HERE for tix! Listen to the best of my standup on Spotify! (for free!) https://spoti.fi/2Dyy41d For Hims! Try hims today by starting out with a FREE online visit. Go to ForHims.com/timesuckED Watch the Suck on Youtube: https://youtu.be/ZTEMoyoYGQQ Merch - https://badmagicmerch.com/ Want to try out Discord!?! https://discord.gg/tqzH89v Want to join the Cult of the Curious private Facebook Group? Go directly to Facebook and search for "Cult of the Curious" in order to locate whatever current page hasn't been put in FB Jail :) For all merch related questions: https://badmagicmerch.com/pages/contact Please rate and subscribe on iTunes and elsewhere and follow the suck on social media!! @timesuckpodcast on IG and http://www.facebook.com/timesuckpodcast Wanna become a Space Lizard? We're over 5000 strong! Click here: https://www.patreon.com/timesuckpodcast Sign up through Patreon and for $5 a month you get to listen to the Secret Suck, which will drop Thursdays at Noon, PST. You'll also get 20% off of all regular Timesuck merch PLUS access to exclusive Space Lizard merch. You get to vote on two Monday topics each month via the app. And you get the download link for my new comedy album, Feel the Heat. Check the Patreon posts to find out how to download the new album and take advantage of other benefits.

Transcript

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0:00.0	The person who takes every opportunity to pick on others is often mistakenly called
0:04.7	sadistic.
0:05.7	In reality, this person is a misdirected masochist who is working towards his own destruction.
0:10.7	The reason a person viciously strikes out against you is because they are afraid of you
0:15.1	or what you represent or are resentful of your happiness.
0:19.1	That's a quote from Anton Leveye, founder of the Church of Satan.
0:23.7	Is that what you'd expect to hear from the guy who wrote the Satanic Bible?
0:27.6	The black Pope, Beale's above high priest, given pretty solid counsel and advice.
0:31.3	It doesn't reference burning your enemy alive with hellfire or setting a legion of demons
0:35.7	upon him to gnash and tear apart their immortal soul.
0:38.3	I mean, he doesn't even reference having an imp bite him on their ankles or something.
0:42.4	Now what I expected, today's episode, not what I expected going in at all.
0:46.7	And I love it when that happens.
0:48.2	I love it when I was totally wrong about what I thought something was.
0:51.9	I thought one way my entire life, do a bunch of research and then I, oh, okay, okay, it's
0:57.4	exact opposite of what I was thinking.
0:58.4	You're going to learn a lot about Satanism today.
1:01.0	And if you're already pretty familiar with it, I think you're going to be pretty surprised.
1:04.2	We're going to examine Anton's legend in today's timeline.
1:07.0	We'll go over the tenets of the faith he formalized, including the 11 Satanic rules of the
1:11.2	earth, the nine Satanic sins and the evolution of the church over the decades.
1:16.2	I'll also walk you through the most infamous of Satanic rituals, the black mass.
	...

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