Well, welcome to Java with Julie at Mission Coffee, and I have a good friend here with me, Dr. Gary Chapman.

And Dr. Chapman, we brought you up here today to answer some tough questions.

We get questions all the time at AuthenticInvacy.com about marriage, about relationship, about sexuality.

And one thing that often happens is we hear from men.

And men are writing in, and they're like,

where's the male version of authentic intimacy?

So you're as close as we can get for today.

All right, here we go.

The male version.

Yeah, that's right.

So first I'm going to ask you some questions that we've gotten written in specifically from men, and then I'd like to ask you a few questions that women are writing in about men. Okay. So you ready? I'm ready. Okay, here we go. We're going to jump right in. I've been married for 10 years to a wonderful woman, but she has close to no sex drive. Every time we have sex, I feel like she isn't enjoying it. I have a constant guilt

every time I ask her. But when we don't have sex, I just feel tempted in every way and like we

aren't connecting. So what do I do? Whenever I bring this up, my wife shuts down. It just feels

hopeless. I think two things. Number one would be go for counseling.

Okay.

Go sit down with a counselor and just say, here's where we are in the journey.

And let somebody else help the both of you talk and hear each other.

Because it sounds like you're not hearing each other.

You bring it up, she shuts down, nothing happens productive.

So that would be my first advice.

A second approach would be to take a book on sex and the two of you sit down and read it together and discuss it together and ask yourselves, after you read the chapter, what can we learn from

this?

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