144: Paul Tough - How To Develop An Intrinsically Motivated Child
The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk
Ryan Hawk
4.9 • 1.4K Ratings
🗓️ 24 July 2016
⏱️ 35 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Episode 144: Paul Tough - How To Develop An Intrinsically Motivated Child
Paul Tough is the author, most recently, of Helping Children Succeed: What Works and Why. His previous book, How Children Succeed: Grit, Curiosity, and the Hidden Power of Character, was translated into 27 languages and spent more than a year on the New York Times hardcover and paperback best-seller lists. His first book, Whatever It Takes: Geoffrey Canada's Quest to Change Harlem and America, was published in 2008.
Paul is a contributing writer to the New York Times Magazine, where he has written extensively about education, parenting, poverty, and politics. His writing has also appeared in the New Yorker, the Atlantic, GQ, and Esquire, and on the op-ed page of the New York Times.
He has worked as an editor at the New York Times Magazine and Harper's Magazine and as a reporter and producer for the public-radio program "This American Life." He was the founding editor of Open Letters, an online magazine.
Episode 144: Paul Tough - How To Develop An Intrinsically Motivated Child
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The Learning Leader Show
"Our Goal Is To Help Our Children Be Independent."
In This Episode, You Will Learn:
- Having a growth mindset leads (not just about skills) to sustained excellence
- Realize that failure will happen... You won't sustain excellence 100% of the time
- How has parenting changed over the last 20 years
- Read "Our Kids" by Robert Putnam
- Parents are more educated = They have more anxiety about their kids
- Parents are more intrusive -- They think everything has to be exactly right -- It puts pressure on children
- Kids need to continue doing basic responsibilities (mow the lawn, wash dishes, etc...)
- Creating a system around incentives is bad
- How do you develop a child to be intrinsically motivated?
- Keep praise for success overcoming difficult moments, not just getting straight A's
- Helping children develop GRIT - How to do it
- The importance of having a coach -- And placing a high value on a great coach
- Understand the messages we send about success and failure
- The value of having a winner and a loser in athletic competitions
"Hearing the word NO is one of the biggest gifts a child can receive."
Continue Learning:
- Read: Helping Children Succeed
- Go To: PaulTough.com
- Follow Paul on Twitter: @paultough
- To Follow Me on Twitter: @RyanHawk12
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Episode 080: Ryan Estis - From Rock Star Sales Professional To World Class Speaker & Entrepreneur
Episode 086: Seth Godin – How To Become Indispensable & Build Your Tribe
Episode 107: Simon Sinek – Leadership: It Starts With Why
Did you enjoy the podcast?
If you enjoyed hearing Paul Tough on the show, please don't hesitate to send me a note on Twitter or email me.
Episode edited by the great J Scott Donnell
Bio From PaulTough.com
Paul Tough is the author, most recently, of Helping Children Succeed: What Works and Why. His previous book, How Children Succeed: Grit, Curiosity, and the Hidden Power of Character, was translated into 27 languages and spent more than a year on the New York Times hardcover and paperback best-seller lists. His first book, Whatever It Takes: Geoffrey Canada's Quest to Change Harlem and America, was published in 2008.
Paul is a contributing writer to the New York Times Magazine, where he has written extensively about education, parenting, poverty, and politics. His writing has also appeared in the New Yorker, the Atlantic, GQ, and Esquire, and on the op-ed page of the New York Times.
He has worked as an editor at the New York Times Magazine and Harper's Magazine and as a reporter and producer for the public-radio program "This American Life." He was the founding editor of Open Letters, an online magazine.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | One thing that I really try to do is is keep my praise for my son's success |
| 0:07.0 | for moments of him overcoming difficulty, right? So if he gets every question right on a test or on a work sheet |
| 0:15.8 | because it was pretty easy for him, like I'm not going to praise that. |
| 0:18.5 | If there's a kind of question that he's really struggling with and kind of freaked out |
| 0:22.3 | about and doesn't enjoy doing and says he can't do. |
| 0:26.0 | But then the next day he like calms down and gets through it. |
| 0:29.5 | I'll definitely praise that, you know, and I'll talk and I'll try and do it and again I'm very |
| 0:33.2 | influenced by Carol Dweck I'll try and do it by talking not about like hey you're |
| 0:37.4 | smart for having answered that question but like I really liked the way that you |
| 0:41.0 | you you know you were able to do it calmly, you really struggled with it the first |
| 0:45.8 | time, but then you were able to succeed the second time. |
| 0:49.1 | All of those messages I think are really important for kids and I think they really relate to them. |
| 0:53.0 | Our leaders born or are they made. |
| 0:56.0 | Our host Ryan Hawk believes that leaders can be made through determined, focused work |
| 1:01.0 | on learning the art and science behind the makeup of other successful leaders. |
| 1:05.3 | Now it's time to inhale knowledge and exhale success. |
| 1:08.6 | You're listening to the Learning Leader Show with Ryan Hawk. Hey guys, it's Ryan, update in regards to the Facebook group we've set up. I'm so happy to see |
| 1:27.0 | the response that we've gotten from so many great fellow learning leaders. The conversation |
| 1:32.3 | and the dialogue has been fantastic so I'd love to |
| 1:34.5 | invite all of you to further the conversation and join us. Simply go to learning leader. |
| 1:40.3 | dot com slash group. Learning leader.com slash group. Leader. |
| 1:43.8 | Come slash Group and we will add you to the community and you can join like-minded |
... |
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