0:00.0	Have you ever canoed down a babbling brook?
0:03.0	No, but I have cried at a Taco Bell.
0:06.0	Oh, same thing.
0:08.0	Listen up, campers.
0:09.0	It's time to buckle up, pitch a tent, and take a hike.
0:11.0	Because camp counselors is a variety show.
0:13.0	So prepare for a good old-fashioned kumbaya, weird news,
0:17.0	hot gossip, and scary stories around the campfire.
0:20.0	So spooky. Is this podcast even about camping?
0:23.5	No, but it is camp. This is camp counselors.
0:30.5	Hey, happy campers. Welcome back to Camp Shady Birch. It is week 136 here at camp. At least I think so. That's what I have written down,
0:41.0	but I also have 137 written down. And I have in the past mentioned that it is in the 180s,
0:47.3	which is incorrect. So just like take it with a grain of salt, you know? Listen, at the end of the day,
0:52.7	your parents have not come and pick any of you campers up.
0:56.4	And it's alarming because now we have CPS involved and they're like, you are not the legal
1:01.1	guardians.
1:01.7	And I'm like, listen, they've been here for years and they won't go because they're addicted
1:04.8	to the bandwitches and the smores and the rowdy raccoons here.
1:09.0	We can't do much as a raccoon around camp with a meth pipe.
1:12.2	And some of you are trying to score.
1:13.5	And I don't get it because it's like that's not the point of this.
1:16.8	And that's on you.
	...

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