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I legitimately have a sex injury and I'm not nearly as adventurous as I bet all of

y'all think that I am. I bet some of y'all think I am so what I'm not.

Anyways, I was crunched up like a little fucking roly-poly in my shower.

Let's just take a moment of silence for everyone who knows their shower could be bigger for a

dual shower. My shower was not made for shower sex. It's a shame. I'm going to go ahead and say

living on the West Coast. If you go on Zillow and you look up homes in the $400,500,000

range in each state, you will be shocked when you get to the West Coast. It's just you don't get as

much bang for your buck and it makes you feel bitter. As a woman from Texas being in Washington,

I'm like, what the fuck? It's not even sunny. It's not even sunny. It's raining. It's raining on

the time and I feel poor and you know what I really feel poor when I'm trying to get fucked in my

shower, okay? That's why I don't anymore. I'm always like bathtub, the bathtub, the bathtub, or

or the bed or off the bed or rather have a carpet burn and if it sounds like my voice is you know

being weird. It's because I'm literally cat-cowing into the microphone. Cat, cow, cat, cow, cat.

I should slow it down. Cat because the middle of my spine just the porcelain, what is it? What is

your shower fucking made out of? Whatever the floor is made out of? Was it made for my spine? I know

that much to be in the roly-poly position trying to get the my butt up for deeper penetration,

a little technique to throw into the intrell. If you're in a, you know, crowded space and you

wanted to, you wanted him to be on top. He wanted to be on top. He wanted that visual. I took it

back to like three, four years old. I remember when you would like roll up onto your shoulder blades

and like hold your butt up like with your hands and make your legs straight up like a pencil and

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