Hey there, welcome back to Jillian on Love.

Today I'm going to share 10 hard but life-changing lessons about love.

That is what I'm talking about today.

The first one in no particular order.

Chemistry without safety is chaos. It's very

possible that you can have an amazing adventure with someone with whom you have incredible chemistry,

but there's no real stability.

There's no real emotional connection or safety there.

And, but a lot of people, what happens is they have amazing chemistry with someone.

And instead of seeing it as this is only what our connection should be, they try to make it into a relationship. And when you have chemistry with someone, but you don't have emotional safety with

them, meaning you don't feel comfortable being yourself with them, You don't feel certain that they are committed to you and vice versa.

You don't feel like you can express an opinion safely without being attacked for it.

You don't feel like you can say what it is that you need. You don't feel secure in the fact

that the two of you can handle disagreements, that you can navigate misunderstandings, that you can

repair after the inevitable conflict

of that comes with being in a relationship with someone over the long term.

When you have chemistry with someone where you don't feel safe, obviously physically,

but when you don't feel emotionally safe, you have chaos. You have anxiety. You have all

your old trauma attachment wounds, stuff from mom or dad coming up. You have a lot of adrenaline, which in the beginning can feel fun, honestly, and can feel passionate

and can feel like, and can make you feel like you are really alive.

But like I said, if we try to make that into a relationship, it is going to be the most,

what we refer to so commonly now in the zeitkeyes, toxic.

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