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The Mark Groves Podcast

#020: Boundaries. Boundaries. Boundaries. with Dr. Alexandra Solomon

The Mark Groves Podcast

Mark Groves

Society & Culture, Relationships

4.95K Ratings

🗓️ 8 April 2019

⏱️ 56 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

What are boundaries, why are they so hard? Why do we suck at boundaries with parents, exes, co-parents? Why don’t we just unfriend or block people that have hurt us? What is stopping us from letting go?! How the HECK do we do boundaries with our co-parent exes!? We tackle it ALL this week and nothing is off the table! Dr. Alexandra Solomon takes on the hardest of subjects with wisdom and compassion, if you haven't yet read her book find it in the show notes below. Episode Highlights: 3min: Boundaries, how to deal with boundary violations. 5min: Cultural differences in boundaries. 7min: Emotions and boundaries, childhood and boundaries. 14min: How do we know when a boundary is violated? 16min: Personal empowerment vs relational empowerment. 18min: Types of boundaries, secure vs porous vs rigid. 24min: Vulnerability cycles - what the heck are they? 27min: Voicing and breaking out of a vulnerability cycle. 30min: How to deliver a boundary. 31min: Tricky boundaries - exes! Why don’t we block them or delete them? 37min: Why don’t we just break contact - are we being kind to them or only to ourselves? 39min: BOUNDARIES AND COPARENTING 101 44min: How to hold space for your child - what impacts your child the most during a breakup? 49min: Types of families. Show Notes: http://www.dralexandrasolomon.com/ http://www.dralexandrasolomon.com/book/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Transcript

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0:00.0

What's up everybody? Welcome back to another episode of the Mark Grove's podcast before I get into introducing this week's guest, which let me tell you this episode is purifier. If you struggle with boundaries and you also don't know how to co-parent

0:23.0

with boundaries or you're just subject as boundaries and man, the guest I had, she is a return

0:29.6

guest and that's because of the immense brilliance she shares. But before I get into talking

0:36.2

about her, I wanted to tell you a couple things.

0:39.0

One, if you have not done it, please subscribe to this podcast to get notified of all the

0:44.2

episodes that pop up each week. And also, if you could go to wherever you listen to this and

0:50.8

give me a five-star rating, you know, go on there, leave a written review.

0:55.0

That's very helpful to bump it up and get it into people's ears so we can talk about

1:00.4

the most important subject on the planet connection and relationship and how to make

1:05.5

our connections thrive.

1:07.3

So I appreciate that.

1:08.7

So without further ado, I am bringing back Dr. Alexandra

1:14.9

Solomon, who is a professor at Northwestern, and she teaches marriage and family therapy,

1:20.3

and I had the pleasure of attending the psych networker, which is a psychology conference

1:24.8

in Washington, D.C. every year, and I hung out with her and attended a lot of

1:29.3

amazing talks. And her and I got a chance to sit down and talk about boundaries and talk about,

1:35.2

you know, we had had a lot of questions. I had had a lot of questions on my Instagram and my Facebook

1:39.5

and my YouTube all about some things I had said about, you know, you got to set some high standards in your life and you got to have some boundaries and people said, well, it's not that easy when you have kids. And I said, okay, well, let's talk about that. So we're just breaking it all down. And Alexander is just a gem of a human being. She's funny. She's brilliant and relatable. And she's also a parent. So, hey, you know, when I start talking about parenting, people are like,

2:03.3

you don't have a kid, and I'm like, I don't.

2:05.5

That's true.

2:06.6

But when I do have one, I'm going to talk the shit out of that.

2:09.4

Anyways, you guys, get ready for this episode.

...

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